General Discussion

My wife passed away from a horrifically aggressive cancer that probably started in her right kidney but had spread throughout her body before she felt anything other than lower back pain. We were both retired Navy and received, excellent assistance from the VA, the help that the VA provided allowed my wife to stay at home, where I could care for her myself to the best of my ability. We both knew that her prognosis was grim but we lived as best we could. I cannot imagine not spending the last eight months of her life by her side. On a Thursday morning she began having trouble breathing, after her doctor's explained that the cancer spread was not responding to treatment she made the decision for Hospice care, she was checked into the Hospice facility on that Sunday, she passed on Wednesday. I honestly can not remember interacting much with the Hospice staff, but the last days of my wife's life were without pain, and I was able to be by her side until the end. Additionally I was referred to a grief counseling group which actually did me good, I consider myself an emotionally healthy and positive person, so have never felt any need to seek counseling of any sort......but in that grief group I was able to open up and say things out loud I could not have expressed in any other setting... I feel badly for anyone that had a bad experience with Hospice or the VA truly I am sorry but for me both entities made the loss I felt more bearable and quickened my healing process.

Later Days