Hillary Clinton

Dear Bernie Supporter -

As you know, President Obama invited Bernie to meet with him this morning at the White House. While one would expect the WH to provide breakfast for such a morning meeting, Sen Sanders could not be sure of that, based on his experience that President Obama "coulda done more" for the middle class.

That's why Bernie stopped by Peet's Coffee on his way to the WH to get a cup of working-class joe and a scone. But then, the DNC stepped in unfairly and asked WH security to double check the sustenance that Bernie brought with him. This resulted in a delay that not only allowed his coffee to cool down to room temperature, but dried out his scone to the point where it was uneatable.

In the meanwhile, it was reported that Hillary Clinton was eating a substantial breakfast that was no doubt paid for with $ raised through our corrupt system of campaign financing.

That's why we're asking you once again to support all that's good in the world by donating an additional $27 to St Bernard's campaign. Doing so assures you that he will take the fight for free college, free cars, free healthcare, free mansions and free X-Boxes all the way to the convention.

Bernie needs you now more than ever. Don't allow the DNC to be successful in their quest to cool down everyone's coffee, and to turn your breakfast danish into a dried-out work of art.

Donate, NOW!

(the above is intended as a parody of a Bernie Sanders fund-raising letter and is not an actual request for funding from the Sanders campaign, DU or Kevin Trudeau).