If there’s one thing that can be said with certainty, it’s that President Donald Trump has ruined Easter for all Americans.

Despite near-constant campaign promises that he would swiftly lower the price of groceries ‒ namely eggs, a rather key component in Easter egg hunts ‒ Trump has failed. Eggs hit a record high of $6.23 a dozen in March.

Perhaps the president has been too busy wrongfully deporting people to barbaric Central American prisons or dehumanizing transgender children to notice that eggs are so pricey they should be rebranded as “Semi-Precious Protein Ovoids.”