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I lost my Dad in 1990, throat cancer. He was only 62, but he'd had a tough childhood, he lost his Dad at 48 when he was only 12. But he also had the best mother, I was the first grandchild - and a girl - so I was close to my grandmother my whole life. And I think my Dad was her favorite, she knew she could depend on him. She also outlived him - and two of her other 4 children - but she always had me.

Weird, I just remembered that tomorrow is Wednesday, when I do my errands, and one I do is stop by the cemetery and give my Dad a new candle, a perpetual light, and water the plant I bring every year. And I also got him a pumpkin when I saw them at the store. That was one of his "jobs," carving the pumpkins with me and my brother. He'd let us pick out the kind of face we wanted.

And my Dad was an engineer as well. He ran the power company in this part of the state. And he never retired, he was the first patient at the local hospital to do chemo as an outpatient - I guess he felt he couldn't miss work - he was definitely a workaholic - and involved in more organizations than I knew.

I do have regrets, it was tough when I was a teenager and I got sent first to summer camp and then boarding school - and I was miserable at the school. But things were better when I was in college. And the one thing I try to remember is that I believe my father trusted me, he knew I wouldn't give him a hard time - like my mother or my brother who would tell my mother.

And I understand about the visitation. That night I fell apart, I didn't want to go home and leave him there. But I was fortunate that my younger female cousin was with me, we'd survived our maternal grandmother's wake together and I was so grateful that she was there.

And I'm also grateful that our late night guys are finally back - we've sure missed the humor and we need it now more than ever - so I'm glad that you found this thread. And his guest tonight was John Oliver which I also posted, one of the best guests!