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"at the point of wanting to kill the next idiot who demands something different than what's written on the "required" paper"... or paying the price for someone elses "screw up"
LOL. I know your pain I tried as well but did not have everything in order.
So now I am going to the county court house to get notarized copies of my residence with taxes paid and the homeowners insurance policy which has the insured property address.
My problem is I don't receive mail at my home. I have a rental PO box because I travel so much.
But I am now checking and double checking the list of requirements and I will take as many IDs as possible and whatever I have that has the residential address.
I go in a few days. Wish me luck.

on edit: I think the intake personnel at the drivers license place are not very well composed. They are inundated with so many people that probably are not very kind and so they treat you in advance as if you are ready to hurl insults. I walked away as well but it was because the 1st time I just needed an ID a duplicate (I had lost mine) and I didn't have what they wanted. Two days ago I walked in to see if I could again but the wait was 4 hours and I wanted to make sure I would get one and from her info I did not have it. I since downloaded what they are looking for and I scheduled online and now I have to go 30 minutes further for the next available appointment. Meanwhile I will get notarized copies from the county court house. Yes, its a hassle. fingers crossed.