Put a cork in it.
That's what my spouse said to me today.
That's her way of telling me to shut the fuck up.
Can you imagine being spoken to in that manner?
Put a cork in it.
So of course, once I was insulted like that, in such a rude manner, I started beating the dead horse even more.
I get frustrated easily...like when I can't get a package open. Or when the kid nextdoor is bonking his sister over the head with a whiffle ball bat FOR 2 FUCKING HOURS right outside my window. BONK BONK BONK BONK.
When I get frustrated, apparently and involuntarily, I tend to say "Jesus Christ, everything's a fucking problem." I don't even know I'm saying it anymore, it just comes out.
So, I couldn't get a package opened today, while simultaneously hearing BONK BONK BONK BONK BONK, So I said under my breath "Jesus Christ, everything's a fucking problem".
So she started mocking me...bad move on her part. "Do you know you say that about 500 times a day"?
"No, I didn't know that".
That's when she told me to put a cork in it.
So, in response to her ruthless and totally uncalled for comment, I responded thusly by quietly saying "Jesus Christ, everything's a fucking problem" to whatever she said to me.
All day. Several hundred times.
When I do this, she pretends she's mad, and she turns her head, but I can still see her shaking from laughter...she just doesn't want me to see her laughing.
Put a cork in it.
PUT A CORK IN IT.
I know this post is rambling on. I had to eat a gummy to try to calm myself down and heal my emotions after being insulted so viciously.
Put a cork in it.
So now she's trying to negate her rude insult by telling me I smell good.
It's too late.
I can't forgive.
Because everything is a problem. 
= new reply since forum marked as read
Sometimes they don't make it easy!
I love cheese. 
There are two things I can't do like a normal person: open packages and wind up electrical cords properly.
I use the good kitchen shears to open up cheese blocks.
They started using this new kind of packaging.
A 3 year old could probably open it easily, but it sends me into a rage. 
I use my kitchen shears to prune my bushes as well, so I don't like using the kitchen shears near food products.
I have shears for the kitchen, I have "work" shears and I have hair shears. There's another pair of shears roaming around and I'm not sure what those are for.
I use regular scissors in the kitchen, and these for everything else.
Milwaukee brand...fantastic pair of scissors.
Everything's a problem!
for the nails!
ymmv
✌🏻
When I get mad or frustrated I go outside a throw rocks down the street or alley until my shoulder hurts. Then I have to eat some IB and have a smoke or some gummies. Because I don't have anyone to tell me to put a cork in it!
Put a cork in it!
I might have needed that!
I need to be told that too!
