Good afternoon DUers, a update on my trip to see Rory

I’m spending these next couple of days with Rory’s daughter, and after church yesterday, which is an event by itself, we ended up forcing ourselves to stop gabbing at 130am.
I learned new things that just reinforced most of what I knew, but filled in some important blanks as it were. His daughter Anissa, whose picture is in my Emily’s deli post, described an idyllic childhood and it seems that he imparted some incredible values in his kids that reverberate to this day.
On the downside, I got all the gritty details of how bad things really are as far as his health situation goes.
Rory has cancer in his throat, his bones, his adrenal glands, his organs just about everywhere. It makes me so grateful for your help getting me here, as when you factor in his advanced progressive MS, doesn’t make treatment of any kind possible as MS is underlying everything else, an autoimmune ailment so any treatment would compromise him so badly that the MS would kill him first.
I can’t begin to tell you how frustrating it is to know that his insurance seems to be fighting his pain medication prescriptions by apparently refusing to fill the OxyContin prescription that should offer him greater comfort. His wife’s family are all very anti drugs and so it’s been really difficult to explain that giving him these medications is the only steps possible and very necessary as everything progresses.

My date with Rory for tonight was cancelled by his wife because he wasn’t feeling well, so the ribs will wait til Saturday. There are so many conflicting emotions that I’m experiencing right now, as I think his needs for care now exceed his wife’s ability to provide and I’m not sure how to handle it. He needs his medications given to him, not offered, he needs his hygienic care every day, not occasionally, he need to be turned every few hours to prevent more bedsores as he has one that goes all the way to the bone in his rear.
I reluctantly filed a report with his social worker asking what can be done as the rule in MN is that he can choose his caregiver to be his spouse without any training required on her part. I just stated that with his recent diagnosis, his need for that care has now elevated to absolutely necessary.

I’m sorry to end on such a negative note, as it is my only hope that Rory be comfortable and comforted in his remaining days. I went to his church yesterday and he didn’t go to that either, and my inner child, is terribly afraid I won’t be allowed to see him again. I pray I’m wrong as that would be devastating beyond my ability to imagine.

For those of you that pray or practice other forms of spiritual meditation etc, please pray for his well being and that things go well for the next five days.

Thank you for listening and please stay near and dear.

Love, John.