Borowitz - Sorry, Loser!

Memo to Donald Trump: if you want people to stop comparing you to Hitler, stop doing such Hitlery things.

For example: stop demanding that employers fire employees for exercising their First Amendment rights. That’s positively Hitlertastic.

According to Trump and his toadying henchmen—Justa Dick Vance, Whiskey Pete Hegseth, and Stephen Miller aka Pee-Wee German—it is now a crime in America to make any comment about Charlie Kirk that does not compare him favorably with Gandhi.

As far as I can tell, though, Trump needn’t worry about a flurry of Kirk-bashing from the abject quislings of corporate media. They’ve been all too compliant in portraying the far-right influencer as a tireless free-speech crusader.

https://www.borowitzreport.com/p/declare-your-independence